Why Am I Still Up?? LoLoL 

Many times we let small things get in the way of the Destiny that we often dream about, that we often pray about or like in my case that we spend a decade writing  about!!

Recently, I opened up to my business manager and totally shared details of my ongoing saga of the powerful, Sexxxii, brilliant man who captured my heart, first through my creative nature as I wrote about this pseudo relationship between him and the main character of my novel for years.. Then in person, just being him, smiling his beautiful smile, giving to those around him openly, rather freely and then she says, “AniYa, my mother always says, when you pray to GoD for something; believe you will get it and don’t push it away……”

“OMG’, I thought, ‘was she in my head or did she just have more wisdom than I fathomed??!!” Alas, I just realized that I didn’t have to question anything anymore and she was rite!!

Back to how I feel and how when our eyes met across the room, I forgot everything that ever was the matter before.. It was like I knew he was there, standing, chatting, being — him..

Him, the person I saw again after a year, looking ever so amazing and a tad bit dishelved, he didn’t have to be perfect for anyone else, because when I looked into his eyes, this time I saw something different!!

How does he know what goes on in my mind, my dreams?? How does he know the inner depths of mii?? How is it that I would drop everything to be near him, what kind of hold of does he even have on mii??

As I looked beyond the past and waved back, I noticed that words were NOT needed nor much movement..

Is this what LoVe is really like??

Respect, passion, secret messages of darn it’s been a while I just want to hug you.. It’s cool, I see you working the room, I see you doing you!! I’ll lay low for a minute but when I speak, this time it will be intentional..

Finally, I found more truth and naturally it excites mii!! I am more at peace totally, infinitely, he is revealing more to mii!!

Why am I up so late??

The more I’m up, is the more I create!!

  • Stay tuned for much more if what is turning out to be something I am coming to truly appreciate.. It’s ALL about Him & Mii!!

AniYa A.

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The Patience to Wait..

 

A little more than 2 weeks ago I was sitting in front of my laptop or was I putting on my coat to walk out of the door?? #Smile Either way, I was busy doing something and in the second of stillness, I heard the Lord as clearly as I am presently listening to Maya Angelous’ “Just Do Right” on Youtube, say, “Do you have the Patience to Wait??”

My first thought was directed towards my NEW desire to purchase the book, “The Wait: APowerful Practice for Finding the Love of Your Life” Waitby Devon Franklin and Meagan Good, Marriage & Waitingbut then it wasn’t why I was thinking about this thought… The thought came to me several times and I thought, it was regarding my constant working out and NOT seeing immediate results, or was it because I had to wait longer for my new apartment, a huge one bedroom in NYC which is the same price as what my parents pay for their mortgage in S. FL for their 6 bedroom, 4 bathroom mansion; or back to Waiting on GoD to send my Hubz to be!!

Last night during our weekly prayer service where we pray for people ALL over the world, I attend Times Square Church, in Times Square Manhattan; the answer finally hit me as to what I was hearing from GoD and why I kept receiving the message about Waiting..

Warning: this is NOT for the faint of heart………

hospWhen I left the hospital, in 08, after having to be rehabilitated from head to toe, I was deemed as disabled, I NEVER heard of the term before because I went to school and worked my whole L.I.F.E and was oblivious, I knew at a young age that I didn’t want to end up being a statistic but there I was jobless, one person I knew called me a degenerate, another “friend” said I was sick because I had HIV/ AIDS and was it true that I was dying?? (I told them I had NEVER contracted the HIV or AIDS and anyone could read my charts as I would give them full permission) Daily I fought, daily I cried, daily I started to believe I would die then one day a Pastor who would always pray for me came face to face with me and said, “AniYa A., you will live and NOT die and you will go back to TBN….”

TBN Crest Regular

She further said, that though I could NO longer work as a full time employee due to me not being able to sit for long periods of time due to the blood clot in my lung, as a Director or Producer, I needed to stay close to GoD by working with the Christian TV Station in whatever facet I was led!!

Here is one of the major turning points of my L.I.F.E

I went from handling ALL of the prayer partners on Tuesday nights, while the “Praise the Lord” taped to becoming a Prayer Partner begging for rides from Port St. Lucie to Ft. Pierce, FL. ALL I wanted to do was get out of the mental and physical jail I was in and be productive again, so I prayed for the People NO matter what..

One day as I picked up the phone to pray, though I had so many issues I battled, I said, “Good evening my name is Sister. A. How may I pray for you??” The woman on the other end said, “Ma’am, I can’t take it no more…. Please pray for me..” As I did every Tuesday night, I got my little prayer sheet ready to take her request!!

“I am ready NOW..”

“Sister A., I need prayer for my four children!!” I could hear the tears leaving the secret safe places of her eye lids..praying

“Well, what is going on, trust me I know many people who NEED prayer for their loved ones and their children!!” Now, I said this NOT knowing the response I was going to get because I NEVER could imagine that a mother could endure so much………

“My daughter has AIDS, my son is homeless with his wife and two of their children living in their car, my other daughter is in jail and my baby son is gay!!homeless

Sister A. PLEASE PRAY FOR ME, I JUST DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!”

Without a word I almost dropped the phone, I now was crying my eyes out but I put the phone on mute so she wouldn’t hear, me a Prayer Partner crying instead of saying the right words.. I gained strength after several seconds and said, with the Lord’s help, “Darling, you are one of the strongest people I have ever spoken too……”

Caller: “Sister A. how do you figure?? I am crying to you and NEED prayer for my children because ALL of their lives are in shambles and this is NOT what I expected..”

I close here, I responded by telling her NOT many people I know would have the strength she has to be calling for prayer, instead they would be drinking and smoking their problems away, but NOT her………… She was strong enough to drop everything and reach up to the source where her help came from!! psalm121-1-2

I prayed but I almost fainted as I thought about her pain, her anguish, probably her thinking that she failed miserably in L.I.F.E..

It is 8 years later and I am asking you, “Do You Have the Patience to Wait??”

To you Mother of Four, with Strength to Endure.. Do NOT Beat Yourself Up, Open the Door for Another!!

Sister AniYa A.

It’s Vintage!!!!!!

Recently, I bought a wallet and was pleasantly surprised when I got home to find a little bitty change purse in the package as well.. To many it may just look like an ordinary change purse but instantaneously I was taken back in time to when my grandmother would carry around her little change purse then I started to feel like an old lady and thought I would look foolish carrying this around, though my favorite granma never did!!

A few days later, while picking up a few items at The Coach Store on Madison Ave., my sales guy and I started discussing different types of prints as well as the type of leather utilized on my Coach bag, the funny thing about that is ALL this time I was carrying around real crocodile on my arms and didn’t realize it as it really never came to mind until that very moment; I proceeded to share that I just got my wallet as well and Mark agreed that it looked like I was enjoying reptile prints very much, we both laughed at this and I concurred that he was right..

Before leaving, I looked down at my little coin purse and I became conflicted and said, “Mark, you are an expert with these things, do you think I will look silly taking out my little coin purse, I fear I may look like an old lady or something!!” (NO disrespect to any beautifully seasoned women out there, you know how much I ❤ you ALL  #Smile) Then Mark turned to me and said, “Honey, NO, it is NOT an old lady looking coin purse; it’s Vintage….”

I close with this, we sometimes have fears of how others may perceive us, we sometimes shrink down because of our ridiculous insecurities or because of issues that haunt us from our past!! I was bullied a lot growing up, especially since I was moved from the North to the South at a very young age where I experienced quite a few problems with peers etc. so today I sometimes worry about what others may think.. As Mark smiled at me and gave me the confidence I needed again, the words played in my head for days..

Often times, Vintage is referred to as an item that is old and comes back into style from years past, but here is  the definition I found after a simple search on http://www.merriam-webster.com: a season’s yield of grapes or wine from a vineyard (2) :  wine; especially :  a usually superior wine all or most of which comes from a single year!!

When you read this last sentence, what does it speak to you??

To me, it sheds light on the fact that yes something can be old, not in perfect condition according to some peoples standards, but when you examine what is truly in front of you, you will see how superior it really is.. I have had to stop worrying about others perception but also value myself and realize that I am ME and that is the Only way I can BE!! Friends, embrace yourselves, know that you can use what has happened in your past and turn it into something fabulous, to Granma, I LoVe and Miss You, your style and carefree nature, to Mark, Thank You for helping me realize the beauty in something so uncanny and to the World, Be Blessed and Remember “It’s Vintage!!”